Memories Make Sense
When you think of preserving memories, most people associate “memories” with visuals - remembering the way someone was dressed on a certain day, looking at family portraits on the wall, or thinking about places where you used to hang out together.
But memories include so much more than just the things that you’ve seen with your eyes. All five senses can both form memories and then remind us of those events even decades later.
Family members of people receiving hospice care often find themselves scrambling to preserve as many memories of their loved one as possible. Here are some ideas for you that incorporate all 5 senses.
1. Sight: Beyond the Photo Album
Seeing old photos together is a wonderful way to remember shared moments, but try taking it a step further. As you go through photos, ask your loved one about the stories behind them. Capture the details you might otherwise forget: Who else was there? What was going on just outside the frame? Make notes on the back of each photo or record audio stories as you look through the album.
Does your loved one collect any particular objects, like shells, postcards, or mementos? Each piece likely has its own history. Ask them about their favorite piece, the story behind it, or the memories that come up when they see it.
2. Taste: Recipes and Restaurants with a Story
What recipes are special to your loved one? Whether it’s a favorite childhood meal or a dish they mastered, write down these recipes and share the stories behind them. Maybe they have a signature dish you always looked forward to or a favorite restaurant where you both ordered “the usual.” Food is a powerful memory anchor, and cooking these recipes together can spark stories and bring cherished moments to life.
Does your loved one have a go-to drink, like a specific tea, coffee, or cocktail? Asking them about it might lead to some delightful stories about when they first tasted it or why they love it so much.
3. Touch: The Power of Connection
Touch has a profound effect on memory and well-being. Gentle, physical contact—a hug, holding hands, or simply helping someone up—can be deeply comforting, especially during vulnerable times. Remember these simple gestures, as they often leave lasting impressions.
If your loved one has a favorite sweater, blanket, or piece of clothing, think about how to repurpose it into a keepsake, like a pillow or quilt. Holding onto these physical items can bring back memories of their presence even long after they’re gone.
4. Sound: Songs, Words, and the Sounds of Life
Sound can evoke memories and emotions in a way nothing else can. Ask about their favorite songs and why they mean so much. Was there a song they danced to at their wedding? A tune that reminds them of a special trip?
Capture the special things they’ve said to you over the years. Were there words of wisdom that changed your perspective? Meaningful phrases they repeated? Hearing these stories aloud can be a beautiful way to reflect and bond.
5. Smell: The Instant Time Machine
Fun fact: smell is the only sense that can skip right past the brain and trigger the body to feel emotions almost instantaneously.
Smell has a direct line to our memories, instantly bringing back places, people, and feelings. Is there a specific scent that reminds you of your loved one? Perhaps they wore a certain cologne or had a favorite candle scent. These aromas can transport you back to shared moments in a heartbeat.
Even seemingly mundane scents like a favorite household cleaner or the smell of their workspace can evoke vivid memories. Bring up these smells with your loved one and see what stories they remember.
This is just scratching the surface of all the different memories you have that are triggered by different senses. What are some of your favorite “sensory memories”? Share with us in the comments!